Movie Review: The Pact

Live Action Reviews!
by Crystal Connor

 

220px-The-pact-posterAfter being blown away watching At The Devils Door, Crystal Connor scoured the earth (well the Internet) to find anything else by this director. Finding The Pact on Netflix, wrapped in a fleece blanket, seated in front of the fireplace picked up her remote and clicked play.  For the next two hours her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

This is the unedited journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she watched, Nicholas McCarthy’s 2012 The Pact

Reader discretion is Advised

Entry 1: No! Don’t go look, get out and call the police, let them look, that’s their fucking job.

Entry 2: See, what I did I just tell you.

Entry 3: Don’t you open that fucking door…ooooh I hate you!

Entry 4: If you feel the need to whisper when talking to yourself when alone that might mean its time for you to get out of the house

Entry 5: OMFG you left the baby in the house, you have to go back!

Entry 6: I like this cop

Entry 7: My God what a kick ass dream sequence =D

Entry 8: Because it’s unbelievable

Entry 9: Are they in a crack house?!!

Entry 10: She’s blind

Entry 11: Really?! Your flashlight doesn’t work…

Entry 12: He did not just hit her in the face…wow

Entry 13: It’s your mom, I bet you anything.

Entry 14: Whoa I didn’t see that coming

Entry 15: I kinda like this creepy little emo girl

Entry 16: Really, a fucking Ouija board? Fucking dumb ass

Entry 17: Don’t you dare fucking scream

Entry 18: lol..he tied her up by her hair. Dude.

Entry 19: Where’s the little girl?

Entry 20: Ok, there she is

Plotline: As a woman struggles to come to grips with her past in the wake of her mother’s death, an unsettling presence emerges in her childhood home.

 Scariness Factor: I am going to give this one a 3 out of 5

 Gore Factor:  N/A this is an atmospheric film with a healthy side order of jump scares

High Points: I really liked the pacing but the movie doesn’t start to get really, really good until toward the end when things started to be revealed. I also liked all of the characters, I think my favorite one is the dark haired girl you see in the trailer who can commutate with the ‘other world’

Complaints: There not complaints, more like annoyances, but because there’s not that many it’s not worth mentioning.

Overall: I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having. I’m a tough customer and I can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to the myopic way in which I prefer to be entertained.

With 20 entries this was a descent movie but nowhere as good as At The Devil’s Door (link to the review below). This version was born from the short of the same name that premiered at as an official selection of the 2011 Sundance Film Festival and in my opinion is a stronger piece than the full feature film. The is a part two to this movie but I don’t plan on watching it.

http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com/2014/10/live-action-reviews-at-devils-door.html

Stars: 3 starts

Where I watched it :Netflix

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Washington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at: http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com / http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor

HorrorAddicts.net 110, Season Finale, Halloween Special

Horror Addicts Episode# 110

Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich

Co-Host: Camellia Rains

Intro Music by: Cancer Killing Gemini

finale9poster

Click to listen:

Season Finale / Halloween Special

emily goodwin, midnight syndicate, miss misery, best in blood

i make love to halloween, events, phantom of the paradise, brian depalma, halloween trivia, artistic license, emerian rich, lilith’s love, dan shaurette, strigoaie the romanian witch, marc vale, morbid meals, zombie yoga, zombie apocalypse, midnight syndicate, cedar point, halloweekends, the dead matter, parlormuse, robot monkey arm, crystal connor, band poll, jeremiah donaldson, david watson, zombies, the calling, apparitions, the woman in black, the haunting, the walking dead, best in blood, ed pope, the herd, grimfest, miss misery, last doorway show, creepy kofy movie time, movie massacre show, forgotten tales, women of horror, welcome to my darkside, monster of golden gate, writers workshop, horror addicts guide to life, disease, m. f. wahl, angela estes, the green eyed monster, mike robinson, patricia santos, the ghost sisters and the girl in hallway b, puzzleman, christopher alan broadstone, j. t. evans, free fiction friday, special guest, emily goodwin, contagion, contagious, the walking dead, the guardian legacy series, mermaid horror, stay, all i need, beyond the sea, bloopers

 

http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddicts110.mp3

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

HA FB Group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/208379245861499/

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Dan Shaurette, Marc Vale, KBatz, Mimielle, Dawn Wood

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

http://www.horroraddicts.net

Movie Review: The Calling

Live Action Reviews!

by Crystal Connor

At 1pm on Aug 30th , 2014, Crystal Connor, wrapped in a fleece blanket, with a giant mug of chicken noodle soup scrolled thru the movie menu, made a selection, picked up her remote and clicked play.  For the next two hours her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

This is the unedited journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she watched, Jason Stone’s 2014 The Calling

Reader discretion is Advised

downloadEntry 1: Call for back up

Entry 2: Seriously? You guys need help

Entry 3: Your way too trusting

Entry 4: You guys need help

Entry 5: No! Don’t even second guess yourself, that voice in your head is screaming for a reason

Entry 6: What are you doing?! Nobody knows where the fuck you are

Entry 7: Way to go, now none of that is inadmissible because you don’t have a warrant

Entry 8: Wait for back up!!!

Entry 9: Are you happy now.

Entry 10: There goes your pension

Entry 11: And your still drinking…yep that’s the best thing to do

Entry 12: Oh my fucking God you’re a goddamned priest! You fucking know better! How dare you allow something like this to happen. You fucked it up for everybody and for that you will burn!

Entry 13: For the love…

Entry 14: Whoa didn’t see that coming.

Entry 15: get up, get up, get up

Entry 16: No, what are you doing…run

Entry 17: I SAID RUN

Entry 18: Oh, Sweet Jesus save us all

Entry 19: I’m buying the book.

 

 

Plotline: Detective Hazel Micallef hasn’t had much to worry about in the sleepy town of Port Dundas until a string of gruesome murders in the surrounding countryside brings her face to face with a serial killer driven by a higher calling.

Scariness Factor: There were some really good suspenseful scenes, especially with the serial killer and the little girl  (yikes)

Gross-out Factor:  N/A

High Points: I really liked that the movie has mature cast and a plausible storyline, the group of five half naked highschool/college kids breaking into a building to play with a ouiji board gets old pretty quick. It didn’t end the way I thought it would so the fact that it wasn’t predictable is a huge plus for me. I loved the motivation of the killer, how he stages the bodies, and the dark tones of the religious undercurrent really helped build the suspense of the movie.

Complaints: My biggest complaint about this movie is the main character.

I’ve seen some reviews say that The Calling is a Fargo knockoff, it’s not. Both movies have a female cops in the lead role trying to solve a crime in the middle of the winter but that’s where the similarities stop. Police chief Marge Gunderson is a much stronger character than Detective Hazel Micallef.

The new trend seems to be that in order to have a ‘strong female lead’ she had to be damaged in some way in order to gain her strength, our Det. Micallef is a functioning drunk and addicted to pain killers. She’s rude, annoying, petty, and shallow and she is not fit for duty. Another thing that bothered me about her addiction is that everyone in the town knows about it but no one says or does anything, even after her impaired judgment endangered other officers. And if that’s not bad enough she’s driving around town like nobody’s business.

Overall: I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having. I’m a tough customer and I can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to the myopic way in which I prefer to be entertained. And even though The Calling had me screaming at the characters for almost the entire movie the character of Det. Micallef is too flawed to be believable.

There is so much depth to the religious back story and the motivation of killer but they just skim it because it’s a crime story with the focus on of Det. Micallef. I think it would have been much more frightening if it had been the other way around.

Stars: Even with my complaints The Calling is a descent chiller/thriller and I would recommend it so I am going to give it 3 stars

Where I watched it : Movies on demand

1795961_803788772983725_1553304502_oWashington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at:

http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com


http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor

HorrorAddicts.net 109, Sumiko Saulson

Horror Addicts Episode# 109

Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich

Intro Music by: Cancer Killing Gemini

————————

Click to listen!

26 days till Halloween!

sumiko saulson, poe, strap on halo, house of usher

dream within a dream, edgar allan poe, the bells, phil ochs, costumes, edgar allan pie, master of macabre 2014 announced, writer’s workshop, band theme song contest, best band poll season 9, events, the black cat, poe, look back in horror, j. malcolm stewart, axes of evil, heavy metal anthology, eulogies 2, tales from the cellar, electric funeral, mark slade, darker edge of desire, gothic tales of romance, mitzi szereto, happiness and other diseases, devil-m, the antichrist, strap on halo, repentance, crystal connor, the sade cafe, c.a. milson, house of usher, poe, horror documentaries, anne rice, tell-tale heart, poe, dead mail, jack-o-lantern pizza, flesh burger, the walking dead, buried alive, the premature burial, end of the world radio, sumiko saulson.

http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddicts109.mp3

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

 

HA FB Group:

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———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Dan Shaurette, Marc Vale, KBatz, Mimielle, Dawn Wood

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

http://www.horroraddicts.net

Movie Review: Repentance

Live Action Reviews!

by Crystal Connor

At 2:42 am on Aug 17th, 2014, Crystal Connor, wrapped in a fleece blanket, seated in front of the fireplace picked up her remote and clicked play.  For the next two hours her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

This is the unedited journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she watched, Philippe Caland 2013 Repentance

Reader discretion is Advised


imagesEntry 1: Did they hit someone?

Entry 2: I want a harp at my book signing

Entry 3: No! When someone says ‘I hear something’ get your ass up and go look.

Entry 4: Get out!

Entry 5: At $300/hr your only helping yourself

Entry 6: What the fuck is wrong w/you? He said he can’t.

Entry 7: If I tell you I’m afraid of the river and you stand up and start rocking the boat I would beat you to death with an oar.

Entry 8: This therapist is a crack-pot

Entry 9: A motha fucking séance? Oh hell no!

Entry 10: Yep. You should be scared

Entry 11: No she’s not!

Entry 12: You show up asking for money and when he offers it to you tell him to go fuck himself because you can’t be bought. Hmmm

Entry 13: You’re in a fucking bomb shelter, no one can hear you.

Entry 14: Once your tied up, the time for negotiation has passed

Entry 15: This Negro here.

Entry 16: “Your making things very hard on yourself.” The very last thing you want to hear from the man holding you hostage in his bomb shelter.

Entry 17: Your lying

Entry 18: You read/saw Misery just like the rest of us, you know that’s going to be that easy.

Entry 19: I told you

Entry 20: Sweet Jesus

Entry 21: So your husband is missing and its just biz as usual for you?

Entry 22: That’s a trap

Entry 23: In what world is that the reasonable choice?

Plotline: Successful author and spiritual advisor Tommy Carter takes on a troubled man as a client, completely unaware that the man’s fixation on his mother’s death will soon put his life in jeopardy.

Scariness Factor: There are a few good jump scares but its more startling than it is scary. From 1 – 5 we’ll give it a 2 ½

Gross-out Factor:  N/A

High Points: It was kind of exciting to watch a movie where the entire cast looked like me. None of the people on screen are there to fill in or reinforce the negative stereotypes, or to be the 1st one to die that we so often see when POC are in a movie or TV show. The setting and the soundtrack are amazing. Every time I see images of Louisiana it makes me want to book flight.

Complaints: Ok, so Ben, Tommy’s little brother is supposed to be a hardened criminal newly released from prison for the umpteenth time. His cussing and using all of this urban language but he doesn’t sound or look authentic. It’s jarring, and because of this he ends up looking like a whiney, it’s always-someone-else’s-fault little boy in a grown man’s body.

This movie had so much potential, but the entire movie is carried by just one actor: Forest Whitaker. These are all A-list actors so  I don’t understand the less than stellar performances.

With about  3rd left to go, you start to see, at least in part, how this movie will end.

Overall: I was so super excited to watch Repentance, but just like Colin Theys’ 2014 Deep Into The Darkness, what could have been something truly terrifying ends up being nothing more than a made for TV melodrama

Stars: I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having. I’m a tough customer and I can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to the myopic way in which I prefer to be entertained.

This movie is classified as horror, but maybe a better tagging would be horror light. I would recommend Repentance as a good movie to show for a pre-teen slumber party or for someone who has a low tolerance for terror.

So despite 23 entries, I am going to give this one a 2 ¾ stars.

Where I watched it : Streaming

1795961_803788772983725_1553304502_o

Washington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at: http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com & http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor

 

HorrorAddicts.net 108, Alexander Beresford

Horror Addicts Episode# 108

Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich

Intro Music by: Cancer Killing Gemini

Click to listen:

40 days till Halloween!

alexander beresford, post rapture party, whitechapel

coolest little monster, john zacherley, halloween prep, whitechapel tv series, jack the ripper, eden lake, wolf creek, dating a zombie, c.a. milson, zombie town, pet cemetery, crystal connor, devil, m. night shyamalan, cam2cam, post rapture party, cropsey, dark wave, music, venus de vilo, queen of the pumpkin patch, a taste of murder, chocolate coconut oblivion cake, end of the world radio, zombies, 809 jacob street, marty young, christine sutton, all the little children, suffer the children, craig dilouie, apocalypse, flash fiction friday, ken macgregor, horror addicts guide to life, events, count dracula and his daughter boocula, reanimator, h. p. lovecraft, the ring, japanese novel, 30 days of night, comic, movie, clive barker, oscar wilde, bela lugosi, dracula, alexander beresford, doll face, charla, www panel audio, emerian rich, heather roulo, laurel anne hill.

 

http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddicts108.mp3

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

 

HA FB Group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/208379245861499/

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Dan Shaurette, Marc Vale, KBatz, Mimielle, Dawn Wood

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

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Live Action Reviews by Crystal Connor: Devil

Live Action Reviews

by Crystal Connor

Devil

 

PDevil_film_posterlotline: Five strangers trapped in an elevator realize that one of them is the Devil in this thriller from director John E. Dowdle (Quarantine) and screenwriter Brian Nelson (Hard Candy, 30 Days of Night). The first installment of “The Night Chronicles,” a film series in which up-and-coming filmmakers bring to life stories conceived by M. Night Shyamalan, Devil opens to find five Philadelphia office workers filing into the elevator of an inner-city office building. But a typical day at the office takes a  sudden detour into terror when the elevator becomes stuck between floors, and the passengers discover that the Devil does exist, and he’s standing right before them. As emergency workers work frantically to free them, secrets are revealed and the passengers realize their only hope for survival is to confront their darkest sins in front of the others. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi for Rotten Tomatoes

Scariness Factor: One a scale of 1 to 5 I would say 3. They’re mostly jump scares and for a connoisseur of all things horror, I can usually see them coming

Gross-out Factor:  N/A.

High Points: I am a huge fan of religious themed horror entertainment. I love all the hidden-in-plain-sight symbolism and the deliberate use of words. This was the 2nd time watching Devil and it was way more fun because I saw all the stuff  I missed when I 1st saw it.

One of the things I really liked was the scenes shot in total darkness. Just like those trapped in the elevator you can see anything but you can hear what’s going on which adds to the tension. I also loved the way the spoken narrative was woven into the movie

Complaints: Shyamalan takes us all the way to the edge but then kinda phones in the ending to give us a somewhat happy one. So instead of it being a thoroughly terrifying experience it’s just a highly startling one.

Overall: I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having and Devil is really fun, like being on a roller coaster. Watching it again was like hanging out with an old friend I haven’t seen in a while.

Stars: 3 ½ Stars

~~~Diary Entries~~~

 

At 1:30 am on Aug 15th, 2014, Crystal Connor, wrapped in a fleece blanket, seated in front of the fireplace picked up her remote and clicked play.  For the next two hours her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

 

This is the unedited journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she watched, for the 2nd time M.Night Shyamalan’s 2010 Devil

 

Reader discretion is Advised

 

Entry 1: And they’re trapped.

 

Entry 2: Clearly he’s claustrophobic

 

Entry 3: Why does the engineer always look like that? We don’t look like that in real life. Come on!

 

Entry 4: HOLY SHIT! Lol that scared the shit outta me.

 

Entry 5: I told you, he’s claustrophobic

 

Entry 6: lol, a captive audience

 

Entry 7: What the fuck? You know better. See! Dumb ass

 

Entry 8: They’re already there

 

Entry 9: No its not and that’s not Jesus

 

Entry 10: What the fuck?

 

Entry 11: LOL

 

Entry 12: Fine then, don’t listen to him

 

Entry 13: Yeah you are cus your not listening

 

Entry 14: Stay your ass where you are!

 

Entry 15: No engineering in their right mind would do that without safety gear! Serously?!

 

Entry 16: And that’s why.

 

Entry 17: My dog is growling at the TV, even she knows better

 

Entry 18: The last thing I would want to hear at that moment would be prayers uttered in Latin

 

Entry 19: Oh my God the fire dept is tearing shit up

 

Entry 20: Oh for fucks sake!

 

Entry 21: Are you trained to do that? Then leave it alone.

 

Entry 22: DON’T!

 

Entry 23: I fucking told you.

 

Entry 24: Excuse me Captain-save-a-hoe but that’s not your job

 

Entry 25: You don’t.

 

Entry 26: Sweet Jesus

 

Entry 27: OMG that’s right!

 

Entry 28: That bitch didn’t just fix her hair.

 

Entry 29: And M. Night for the win

1795961_803788772983725_1553304502_o

 

Washington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at:

http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor

 

HorrorAddicts.net 107, Wm. A. Yandell

Horror Addicts Episode# 107

Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich

Intro Music by: Cancer Killing Gemini

Click to listen!

54 days till Halloween!

wm. a.  yandell, mixed messages, jennifer’s body

heard it in the graveyard, halloween prep, end of the world radio, dead mail, avery, horror poetry, amy lowell, after hearing a waltz by bartok, events, night of the living dead, nosferatu, edgar allan poe, neve campbell, anne rice, books, the clinic, matthew weber, don pitsiladis, michaelbrent collings, this darkness light, dark blossom, vincent stoia, red beans and rice, feeding the lwas vodou cookbook, amy sumida, best band season 8, unveil, mixed messages, flash fiction friday, kadriah wade, they buried her deep, theme song contest, master of macabre contest, jennifer’s body, hemlock grove, under the dome, terry m. west, heroin in the magic now, crawl or die, crystal connor, the last road, crossback, wm. a. yandell

http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddicts107.mp3

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Dan Shaurette, Marc Vale, KBatz, Mimielle, Dawn Wood

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

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The Last Road

Live Action Reviews

by Crystal Connor 

The Last Road

download

Plotline: Story of a fighter down on his luck, who loses his life in the ring. The movie then takes us into the afterlife, where Toby meets a stranger that seems to know everything about him and he has to make the right choices to which road to take… Heaven or Hell… with no initial help or clues. He meets many other souls on his journey who could take him down many different paths. Coming to his final heart wrenching decision… There are many cruel, sometimes disturbing, but also emotional twist and turns.

– Synopsis written by Laurence Williams for IMDb

Scariness Factor: This film isn’t scary its atmospheric and haunting

Gross-out Factor:  N/A.

High Points: Visually this film is stunning with a capital S. The Last Road was filmed in the Salisbury Plain located in England, in the valley of the Bratton White Horse. The surrounding landscape becomes a character because this is John Wheeler’s vision of hell. The problem is that these people are wandering around this beautiful place with absolutely nothing to do,  I really liked that because as you know being bored is a kind of hell in and of itself.

Complaints: Toby. After the opening scene I really didn’t like him and then watching the way he interacted with his mother … just eight minutes in and I was completely disconnected  from this character.  Maybe he was written that way in order to justify the reasons for him going to hell.

The film is very well acted but there seems to be huge pieces of the story missing, like it was a film adapted from a book. For instance the flash backs on Toby’s childhood life and the one ‘incident’ with his father aren’t horrible enough to excuse the way he acted and the choices as an adult. If this was based on a novel I couldn’t find it, and trust me I looked.

Overall: I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having. Now there are only eight entries for The Last Road, and compared to my other reviews that’s not that many but that doesn’t necessarily mean The Last Road wasn’t a good film.

For one it’s not a horror movie but because of the cinematography it is a haunting one. I spent quite a bit of time pausing and rewinding trying to connect the dots, to better understand why the things that were happening happened. That along with what’s listed above The Last Road just didn’t work for me. Like I’ve said before I am a tough customer and I can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to the myopic way in which I prefer to be entertained. But if you were planning on watching The Last Road my advice would be I think that you should.

Stars: 2 ½ Stars

~~~~Diary Entry~~~ 

Late in the afternoon on Aug  5th, 2014, Crystal Connor, with a bowl of popcorn and a coke,  settled down in to watch a movie. For the next two hours her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

 

This is the unedited journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she viewed John Wheeler’s 2012 The Last Road

 

Reader discretion is Advised


Entry 1: When you’re standing before St. Peter, or in this case his asst. you pretty much already know where you’re going.

 

Entry 2: Leave shit alone!

 

Entry 3: Wow, even the dog went to hell.

 

Entry 4: Queue the naked and underdressed women.

 

Entry 5: Ok, don’t listen to him…

 

Entry 6: Really?!

 

Entry 7: Wait a minute, he just got to hell and just like that he has the rank/power/knowledge to torture and torment others?

 

Entry 8: Wait … what?

 

1795961_803788772983725_1553304502_oWashington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at:

http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor


			

My Sucky Teen Romance Review

Live Action Reviews!

by Crystal  Connor

 

In the early morning hours of July 12, 2014 Crystal Connor, with a bowl of popcorn and a coke, settled down in to watch a movie. For the next 77 minutes her neighbors were subjected to screaming, crying, and expletive outburst…

The following is from the unedited fanpage journal chronicling the harrowing experience her neighbors were forced to endure as she watched Emily Hagins 2011 My Sucky Teen Romance

Reader discretion is Advised

330644464Entry1: That’s what you get, he was running from her for a reason. Dummy.

Entry 2: Lol, they’re all getting ready for horror convention.

Entry 3: Yep, your preaching to the choir. That’s exactly why I am completely over anything YA.

Entry 4: LMMFAO!

Entry 5: …and Edward from Twilight has a gun.

Entry 6: #teamredhead even though I just hated her moments before.

Entry 7: LOL!

Entry 8: Really?! Your just gonna stand there…run, ok see I fucking told you.

Entry 9: Finally, a character in a horror movie who knows how to mind their own business! You don’t need to follow the body that’s being dragged down the hall…

Entry 10: Seriously?! Fat ass! You just fucked it up for everybody.

Entry 11: Your either gonna sparkle or burst into flames. LOL

Entry 12: Are you fucking serious, I wish I would be at a con and hear a panel speaker talk that way to a kid.

Entry 13: And I hate the red head again.

Entry 14: Garlic’s not gonna work…

Entry 15: But that wooden stake sure did.

Entry 16: Please, please don’t cry. Awww I wish I could hug you.

Entry 17: And que the tears…

Plotline: When 17-year-old Kate (Elaine Hurt) and her friends decide to attend the science fiction convention they traditionally go to each year, they aren’t prepared for what they find. For it is at this convention that Kate meets and falls for Paul (Patrick Delgado), a handsome teen boy and newly turned vampire. He accidentally bites her, beginning her transformation. Her friends must find a way to return Kate’s humanity while fending off the attacks of other vampires that attend the event.

Scariness Factor: Zero, zilch, zip! This romantic comedy is a family friendly ‘horror’ movie.

Gross-out/Gory Factor: This is a vampire movie, so of course there’s blood. On a scale from 1 to 5, it’s a solid 1

Complaints: Absolutely none

High Points: The fact that this movie revolved around a horror convention! I first started attending cons as a volunteer and then as a vendor after the publication of my first book. The depiction of the con culture, the people who don’t ‘get it,’ the type of people you see there, the security guards … all of it is spot on.

When Kate is ‘turned’ her friends use everything they’ve seen in horror movies and video games to try and save her. The garlic and Holy water scene made me cough up Coke I was laughing so hard.

Overall: When Em asked me to review My Sucky Teen Romance I didn’t look up anything about this movie or watch the trailer. I’m a tough customer and I can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to the myopic way in which I prefer to be entertained.

Not knowing anything about this amazing movie allowed me to enjoy it that much more. I think watching horror movies should be an ‘interactive’ activity (which is why I watch them alone) and the more I yell at the people on the screen the more fun I’m having.

I really liked this movie, with pretty good, rounded out characters, a solid storyline, special effects that weren’t over the top, and plenty to yell at the characters about it was blast!

Stars: 4 ½ Stars

Where I watched it: Netflix Streaming

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1795961_803788772983725_1553304502_oWashington State native Crystal Connor has been terrorizing readers since before Jr. high School and loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes & unreasonably priced hang bags. She is also considering changing her professional title to ‘dramatization specialist’ because it’s so much more theatrical than being just a mere drama queen. Crystal’s latest projects can be found both on her blog and Facebook fan page at:

http://wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor

 

13 Questions’ Most Horrifically Fun Interviews

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Alright Horror Addicts, do I have a special treat for you? Well, let me put it this way…would any woman make a deal with a crossroads demon to spend a night with the boys of Supernatural?  If you don’t know the answer to that question, then you my ex-friend are in the WRONG place 😉

In honor of our upcoming 100th episode of Horror Addicts, I have wadded through the years of 13 Questions to bring you MY Top 10 favorite interviews!

Whether it be their insane sense of humor, their demonically seductive personalities, or just their undying passion for what they do…Below you will find the 10 Masters and Mistresses Wickeds that have left a mark on me; (Thankfully it wasn’t the black spot! Phheeewww!) as well as my favorite snippet from their interview.

Each author’s name will be a link to the real goodies (a.k.a. their original interview). Now, let’s get this hauntingly exciting review kimberlysteelestarted!!!

10. Kimberly Steele-

[“I feel that my pathetic, obsessive lurking around Emerian’s fabulous site and community becomes slightly more legitimized because I’ve been asked to interview twice.”

You may have heard the rumors going around that Emerian and Kimberly hate each other. After you read what Steele had to say about the rumors you’ll see what’s going on. “She’s my sister by a different mister, I love that chica. Emerian and I share Criss Angel. We get at each other, but it’s really Criss is to blame. He’s a slut.”]

shaunessyscaredshitless9. Shaunessy Ashdown-

[Shaunessy prefers the “monsters” that are “closest to reality.” “Serial killers, jilted lovers that fly off the handle, the sort of badies you find in thrillers like “Psycho” or “Fatal Attraction.” It’s fascinating to explore what turns a person evil…though in the supernatural realm, witches and ghosts really capture my imagination, maybe because they are the most real to me.”]

8. Patricia Santos-  patricia santos

[Excitingly enough the “short” Patricia will be sharing with us an excerpt of her novel The Weeping Woman. Not wanting to give away too much information, all I could get out of Patricia was a small description about the excerpt. “It’s what I call my Mexican exorcism scene. A healer is removing a curse from a young girl. Pretty creepy. You’ll never look at a snake the same way.”]

7. Crystal Connor-

crystal connor[My writing affects everything else. I write at night, so I really don’t have that much of a social life; everyone I love lives normal lives and sleep during the night. The way you’re supposed to haha. But the transition from punching a clock and being financially secure, to trying to carve out a life on the earnings of book sales has really shown me who my friends are. And luckily for me everyone who was around when I was spending money like there was no tomorrow are still with me today.]

 

6. Rick Kitagawa-

[“Hands down, my favorite monster is probably the Creature from the Black Lagoon and other aquatic-based rick_kitagawacreatures.  While the Gill Man is not the strongest or most terrifying of the bunch, he just looks so frickin’ awesome.  Actually, I’m working on (yet) another comic project that focuses on the Creature and other monsters, but puts them in day jobs and awkward social situations with each other.  It’s actually completely not scary at all (much more slice of life/emo stuff), but that just goes to show how much I like the Gill Man. I’m even willing to do a comic that’s not even remotely creepy because I like him so much.”]

5. Jennifer Rahn-

Jennifer Rahn[“I am a scientist, currently researching brain tumors. I did a stint in the biotech industry after my Msc (sic) in Pharmacology and then did my PhD in breast cancer, so I’ve got quite a wide range of experiences that I could use to build up a story environment. I think it all gave me a lot of background fodder for the first novel, and I have an idea for a scifi whodunit, so it probably will provide me with background again, but the nice thing about writing fantasy is that it doesn’t necessarily have to be scientifically accurate!”]

4. Joshua Heinrich-  joshua_heinrich_2009

[Josh’s relaxed nature took hold and he began to joke around while explaining his story The Basement to me. “It’s a bit over 1700 words.  Originally written in Times New Roman.  12 pt, I believe.  In English.  There’s a basement involved.  Okay, okay.  I’ll stop.  It’s a story I actually wrote a few years back.  It sort of jumps into the story of a woman locked in a pitch black basement, sort of following her actions and inner narrative as things come into focus.  I’m not sure I really want to give any more away before your listeners experience the story.  I guess that’s the problem with promoting stories with twists or that evolve into something else as the narrative goes along…it’s hard give a summary without spoiling the whole thing.”]

3. Shana Abé- 

shanaabe[I watched hawks a lot. Eventually I could identify entire families. They’re graceful and deadly, and one afternoon I was watching them slice through the air when I thought, “Dragons! Aha!” Because although hawks are cool, dragons are even cooler. You can say whatever you want about dragons, create any mythology you want for them. They are purely products of our deepest, darkest imagination.

In fact, there’s a scene in The Deepest Night in which Lora and Armand are discussing why they–their species–are so feared by humans. Armand says: “Because dragons are the most formidable creatures of all. Because we exist at the fringes of their imaginations, nefarious and bloodcurdling and never quite fully defined. We can be shaped however they wish, assigned any horrific trait they dare to invoke. We’re the accumulation of all that they fear, most of all themselves.”]

2. Wicked Women Writers/Masters of Macabre-

There really isn’t a specific WWW or MMM that I enjoyed interviewing over the other. In fact, I found that it was the experience of doing a group interview of so many extraordinary authors that makes my WWW and MMM interviews some of my favorite!

www

mmm

And my favorite interview of all time is…dun…Dun…DUUUNNNNNNNNN

1. Emerian Rich-

[As the Horror Hostess that she is, I had to ask what actually got Emerian into the horror genre in the first place? “Horror and darkeemmzz beauty inspire me to create, to live, to be. It sounds like a rather strange thing to say, that things usually involving death or terror inspire you, but I think it is the key to horror culture that outsiders will never really understand. I think it is a true test of the soul when someone is tortured or brought to the brink or death. There is a beauty when a character decides to accept the darkside or when they conquer it through personal strength. I am not a fan of mass murder or child abuse or terrorism in our real lives. However, I am a fan of the child or wife or soldier who battles through and shows that our human spirits can endure pain and still prevail.”]

Sinister Love: They All Lived Happily Ever After!

Best Friends Forever, the 3rd Story in Crystal Connor’s anthology ‘…They All Lived Happily Ever After!’

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Jennifer,

Yesterday, when I was showing people my pictures of you, and telling everyone how much I love you I paid a homeless lady $20 when she told me she could cast a voodoo spell that will protect our love forever.

-With my undying love, Mikala

Mikala, please this has got to stop. I’ve tried to be patient and understanding but now your starting to scare me. Speaking of pictures I shared one of you too. It’s posted at the front desk of my job, the lobby at Curves, and inside my building. If anyone sees you they will call the police. I really don’t want it to come to that so please don’t force my hand. If you love me as much as you say you do then please, Mikala, leave me alone. This relationship is over and so is our friendship.

Jennifer,

Your so cute, the whole set it free thing! I know if I set you free you would come back to me so there’s no need to “prove it”. Sometimes I jab myself with a needle and bleed a little whenever I think of you leaving me to remind myself how much it would hurt if you really did. I love you always, Mikala

Jennifer,

I just wanted to make sure everything is ok. I waited for two days outside of your office, I was gonna follow you to mare sure you got home alright. I tried calling you when I didn’t see you but there is something wrong with your cell phone its saying the number is no longer in service. I just left your apt and there are movers there and they are packing up all your things.  Do you remember that waitress from Denny’s who kept bringing you free drinks? Well she fell & broke her arm in three places…so she doesn’t work there anymore. I was able to find her and I will be able to find you too so you better come back before someone else gets hurt!

Jenny-bean,

I hope things are going well with you. I got your name tattooed under my tongue so all my words of love flow from you. I am going to find every girl that you ever looked at and make sure she understands how much you mean to me. I already found Jessica that stupid bitch from the laundry matt. Anyway I just wanted to tell you how much I love you.

Oh I almost forgot did your mom get the flowers I sent her? I love you…Muah!

To Jennifer Layne

Sender: Detective Jason Webber, Threat Assessment Division

Re: Mikala Steward,

Miss Layne

I understand your concern and frustration in regards to Miss Steward. To answer your first question, yes, everyone working here is taking this very seriously. The prosecutor is building a case with the evidence you have provided. To answer your second question as soon we locate Miss Steward she will be served with the restraining order, and arrested. And finally no, we still have not been able to locate Miss Jessica West, but it shouldn’t be long now as we have officers searching for her 24/7. Please feel free to contact me with any other questions you may have. You have my card but if you’ve misplaced it the phone numbers for both my desk and cell phone are at the bottom of this email. Please rest assured that we are working hard to bring this situation to a close.

Det. J. Webber

Oh my gosh Jen,

I am so sorry to hear about the death of your friend Jason, I know how much he meant to you, you would think a cop would check his break lines before he dashed off on a high speed car chase like that. I saw you at the market today and I think I’ve told you before but just in case you forgot I really hate that yellow dress. Its too short I hate the way men look at you when you were it. Did I tell you I got a job! You’ll never guess where I’m working… Do you give up? Lol, I got a job at the By the Bay retirement center!!! Oh your grandmother is so beautiful! It’s no surprise that you and your mom are too. Like they say the apple doesn’t fall that far from the tree! Well this game is getting old so I expect you home by next Sunday, I’ll make lamb cuz I know its your favorite. I love you. You mean more to me than you could ever know, your more than just my girlfriend…you’re my best friend. See you in 11 long days

Dear diary,

I must have been an horrendous person in my first life, but I can’t for the life of me imagine what I could have done so horribly wrong to warrant this type of punishment. I’ve only been back for three days and Mikala is already suggesting that we take a weekend trip to a state that will allows us to be married. My false happiness needs to be believable because when its not she starts talking about how sweet my Na-Na is. Oh dear God in heaven have mercy on my soul.

Dear diary,

It’s Thursday and our wedding plans have been pushed back to another month. Mikala isn’t, hasn’t been feeling well for quite sometime and the doctor doesn’t know what’s wrong. Her headaches are almost constant now and this morning she seemed disoriented. For a brief moment it was as if she didn’t even know me.

7/10

Its official Mikala is now on permanent medical leave she’s in constant pain and she never seems to get enough sleep. She can barely stand, let alone work around the elderly. Poor Mikala.

Dear diary,

Today is the 12th of November and like promised it’s snowing! Mikala is suffering beyond description, I think this is going to be one of the best Xmas’ I’ve had in a long time. Did you know that there is arsenic in laundry detergent…The truth really doesset you free. Ha-ha! Mikala is on a ventilator now, but my Na-Na moved in to help, Mikala always spoke so highly of my grandmother, it’s almost poetic that it’s my grandmother that will help Mikala through the end. And the thing is – Mikala knows, you can see it in her eyes, if only you could have saw her face the day she figured out what was going on. It was priceless!

Nov 28th

As if a gift from God Mikala’s kidneys failed last nite. It won’t be long now! Na-Na says she can help things along by ‘regulating’ Mikala’s oxygen.

Dec 7th

Sadly this is my last journal entry, with the freezing weather the fire needs constant kindling and nothing burns faster than paper.   I’m going to miss the quiet times I’ve spent with you my dearest diary but all good things must come to an end. I have to start making burial arrangements, Well its getting late, I want to make sure Mikala knows how much I love her before I go to bed. But I have to share this with you before I toss this book into the fire. I’ve already started writing Mikala’s eulogy. I want to get it perfect so I started practicing it, and this is what I have so far:

‘In sickness and in health, even though we never made it to the altar Mikala was so much more to me than my lover she was my best friend.’

Crystal ConnorAuthor photo
Washington State native Crystal Connor is a horrorpreneur who loves anything to do with monsters, bad guys, rogue scientific experiments, jewelry, sky-high high heel shoes and unreasonably priced hang bags. Connor has been writing science fiction and horror since Jr. High school, has been published in various anthologies and is the author of the Spectrum Trilogy. Connor’s début novel, The Darkness, the first book in the Spectrum Trilogy was selected as a two time Award-Winning Finalist in the 2011 International Book Awards in the fiction categories of Cross Genre Fiction and Multicultural Fiction.
notesfromtheauthor@hotmail.com
www.facebook.com/notesfromtheauthor
www.wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com

13 Questions with Crystal Connor

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It’s that time of year again addicts, time to fulfill your blood thirsty urges for guts, gore, movies, books, vampires, zombies, and everything else your horrific black heart desires!IMAG0753

To get the 8th apocalypse started, we have the one and only The Darkness author, Crystal Connor! And, as a true HA fan she was more than happy to talk with me for an exclusive interview for all her fellow fans out there. “I’m crazy excited about being interviewed for Horror Addicts. I’m a connoisseur of all things horror so this is like a milestone for me”

For episode 85 of Horror Addicts, Crystal was kind enough to share with us her short story, Best Friends Forever. “[The story is one] that I wrote for my anthology …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! It’s in the process of becoming an audio book narrated by the amazing Kay Richardson who has the most amazing voice. I’m really excited about the audiobook, even though I wrote the stories every time I hear a story it’s like a whole new experience and only serves to take my excitement to even a higher level.”

Crystal didn’t want to give too much about Best Friends Forever away but she was kind enough to give us a little sneak peek into her story. “BFF tells a story of an end of a relationship and the dark and unsettling places a person will go to in order to keep the person they love, or escape.”

Now, like I mentioned above, Crystal is well known for her novel The Darkness. For those of you unfamiliar with the dark tale go out and get it HERE. And for the rest of you, Crystal would like to share with you the beginning of The Darkness. “When I 1st wrote The Darkness I thought it was a short story. I was working in a boat yard at the time, the wielding instructor there is a big prize winning author and he heard I was a writer and asked if he could read my work. So I took him The Darkness and basically flipped out and told me that it wasn’t a short story, that I was being lazy and I needed to start taking my writing seriously because it was more than just a hobby.  That turned out to be the best advice anyone has ever given me.”

Crystal_MorganBook two of the trilogy is also available, if you haven’t heard of it yet then you are in for a treat. You can find book two: Artificial Light on Amazon.

“I currently have three publications. The Darkness and Artificial Light, books I & II of the Spectrum Trilogy and my anthology …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! The Darkness and Artificial Light are available in both print and e-book format. …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! is only available in print because the unique interior design does not translate into a digital format which is why …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! will be available in an audio format.”

Having churned out three publications and other short stories, I just had to know how writing has affected Crystal’s life lately. This was her response:

“It’s my full time job. Right after the release of Artificial Light I started really talking seriously about quitting my job to write full time and what was surprising is how much support I received from my family and friends. They’re not kidding when they say starving artist and it’s been hard but I have a really good circle of support and things are starting to get a little easier.

My writing affects everything else. I write at night, so I really don’t have that much of a social life; everyone I love lives normal lives and sleep during the night. The way you’re supposed to haha. But the transition from punching a clock and being financially secure, to trying to carve out a life on the earnings of book sales has really shown me who my friends Front Coverare. And luckily for me everyone who was around when I was spending money like there was no tomorrow are still with me today.

Sometimes when I think about how much my family and friends mean to me and how they’ve all supported and continue to support me I get so overcome with gratitude that I literally burst into tears. I don’t know why I do that.”

Crystal is looking forward to the day that she can “earn enough fans to be able to make a decent living doing something that [she loves].”

Be on the lookout for future work by Crystal Connor! Being a full time author, there is a lot that she is currently working on. “Well like I said, the production is underway to turn my anthology …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! into an audio book and I am currently working on the final book in the Spectrum Trilogy. I do have some other projects simmering on the back burner but I would like to get these two finished and out the door before I starting talking about what’s next.”

For more information on Crystal Connor…be sure to check out these sites!

http://www.wordsmithcrystalconnor.blogspot.com/

https://www.facebook.com/CrystalYConnor

And as a special Thank You to all you Horror Addicts out there, here is her interview for the …And They All Lived Happily Ever After! launch party!