It Came From the Vault: New Year’s Resolutions Are for Everyone, Even the Undead by Heather Roulo

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How are your Resolutions coming along? In this short Guest Blog I found in the Vault, by Heather Roulo.  A Resolution’s list fit for a zombie!

New Year’s Resolutions Are for Everyone, Even the Undead

by Heather Roulo

The holidays are tough. Even being undead doesn’t put an end to the stress and expectations. So, for the New Year, I’m posting my resolutions. If I can stick to them, so can you!

  1. Diet & Exercise: I haven’t been feeling myself. I’m sluggish and my figure has suffered. From now on, it’s quality food all the way: Human brains, no more animal brains no matter how tempting they look. And the new pedometer I found ensures I’ll shuffle at least 5,000 steps a day. Gotta keep going while I have two good legs, especially since the left one is looking a little soggy.
  2. Reevaluate What I’m Doing with my Undead Existence: This is all we get. At any time, an angry mob, accidental avalanche, or something pointy could come along and I’d be finished walking this earth for real this time. I didn’t like it when my life flashed before my eyes the first time, so my undead life needs to be full and rich, because re-runs are never as good.
  3. Take A Trip: I can’t remember the last time I took a vacation just to see the world. Flying is out, since they locked down all the airports, but it doesn’t seem to have stopped others of my kind from reaching every corner of the earth. With a little determination I can hitch a ride on some survivor’s RV and truly explore nature.
  4. Manage Stress: It’s always fight and hunt, hunt and fight around here. When does a zombie get to just relax? And even when I get the chance, it’s hard to chill when the rest of the horde is getting ahead. But I need to find me time. There’s nothing more peaceful than a deep dark hole, and I’m resolved to dig myself a nice one.
  5. Manage Debt & Save Money: I have totally cut my addiction to credit cards and hardly spend a dime anymore, but somehow creditors continue to hound me. I’ve eaten a few, but it’s never as much fun when they’re chasing you. A little more fiscal responsibility and maybe I can pay off those debts and get them off my back.
  6. Improve my Knowledge & Learn a New Skill: With time, people change. I definitely have interests I’d never have considered a few years back: anatomy, the mechanics of doorknobs, and easy solutions to barbed wire, to name just a few. I’m thinking there must a school, or class, or maybe an online course I can take. If not, I’ll figure it out. Maybe I’ll write a book, because if I’m confused then others are too.
  7. Participate more in my Community and Give Back: Charity begins at home. When I have a lot, you know I share. My hole is your hole. My brains… Stay away from my brains.

And I’m going to take a minute to congratulate myself on last year’s resolution to Drink Less & Smoke Less. My new fear of fire really cut back on the smoking, and alcohol is tasteless. I can’t get drunk, and rarely experience social anxiety anymore. I can’t remember the last mixer I attended. It’s true, that if you avoid situations where you’re used to drinking, you fall out of the habit. Sure, others might say I take a swish now and again, but it’s medicinal. It clears the moss off my teeth.

Times keep changing, but it’s funny how resolutions aren’t that different no matter who you are. So, keep me honest and ask me, next year, how the diet went.

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It Came From the Vault: Traditions by Stephen Kozeniewski

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TRADITIONS

by Stephen Kozeniewski 

Granny clattered on the counter with a wooden spoon until the children stopped squabbling. When they finally turned to pay attention, she smiled, baring each and every bright white denture with joy.

“All right, little nuggets,” she said, “Now granny is going to show you what to do. Come up here.”

She lifted two-year-old Benji and planted him on the counter beside the sheer metal stockpot that was almost as tall as him.

“Now, Benji, this wax is very hot so don’t put your fingers in it and don’t splash.”

“Yes, grandma.”

“Now start to feed the coil in slowly and let me know when you run out of length.”

Giggling, Benji did as he was told.

“Granny, why do we wax the decorations?” little Suzie asked, her pinky hooked into the corner of her mouth.

“So that they last, my dear.”

“And why do we want them to last?”

Granny crouched down to Suzie’s level, even though it pained her ankles.

“Because it’s a tradition, my dear.”

Little Suzie’s eyes lit up with the wonder of excitement and recognition.

“A t’adition?”

Granny nodded.

“Like when we invite a homeless person in for Christmas?”

“That’s right.”

“All done!” Benji announced, clinging to the last link of this year’s holiday visitor’s small intestine.

Together, as they did every year, they draped the wax-dipped organ around their tree of horrors. The attic was starting to overflow with their collection of decorations.

“God bless us every one,” Benji said joyously.

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Kozeniewski Author PhotoStephen Kozeniewski (pronounced “causin’ ooze key”) lives with his wife and two cats in Pennsylvania, the birthplace of the modern zombie. During his time as a Field Artillery officer, he served for three years in Oklahoma and one in Iraq, where due to what he assumes was a clerical error, he was awarded the Bronze Star. He is also a classically trained linguist, which sounds much more impressive than saying his bachelor’s degree is in German. Find out more at: www.amazon.com/author/kozeniewski

HorrorAddicts.net 136, Finale: G TOM MAC, Abie Ekenezar, The Count

Horror Addicts Episode# 136
SEASON 11 Finale & Halloween Special
Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich with Camellia Rains and Ariel DaWintre
Intro Music by: Valentine Wolfe

11finale

g tom mac, abie ekenezar, the count

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

9 days till halloween

cry little sister, skullman contest, halloween costumes, horror door hangers craft, blood of socorro county, sean t. young, movies, underworld, phantasm ravager, the ouija, madea’s halloween, the windmill massacre, sorority slaughterhouse, the laughing mask, the charnel house, unfriend, incarnate, amityville the awakening, the bye bye man, split, m.night shyamalan, the happening, resident evil: the final chapter, property horror, butch patrick, lobsterman jeopardy at sea, midnight texas, david, books, mark taylor, the human condition, penn jillett, stephen king’s, mr.mercedes, the cell, the count interview, cemetery confessions, the belfry, deaths in 2016, david margulies, angus scrimm, sweet kill, alan rickman, snape, harry potter, sense and sensibility, colonel brandon, something lethal, best in blood, new contest coming 2017, h.e. roulo, submissions call: clockwork wonderland, tales from the lake 4, crystal lake publishing, horror addicts guide to life, david watson, abie ekenezar interview, z nation, grimm, the librarians, twin peaks, christian kane, jonathan frakes, twin peaks, dead mail, zombie novel, todd, melinda, sara, justin, zombies why do we love them? george romero, night of the living dead, dawn of the dead, survival, the stuff, dan shaurette, morbid meals, g tom mac interview

 

Craft – Door Hangers

https://horroraddicts.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/finale-craft-horror-door-hangers-zombie-alarms

The Belfry

http://www.thebelfry.rip

Abie Ekenezar

https://www.facebook.com/babsek79

G TOM MAC

http://www.gtommac.com

“Broken Pieces” by Valentine Wolfe

http://valentinewolfe.bandcamp.com/track/broken-pieces

HorrorAddicts.net blog Kindle syndicated

http://www.amazon.com/HorrorAddicts-net/dp/B004IEA48W/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1431022701&sr=8-1&keywords=horroraddicts.net

 

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Stacy Rich, Dan Shaurette, KBatz (Kristin Battestella), Mimielle, Killion Slade, D.J. Pitsiladis, Jesse Orr, Lisa Vasquez

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

http://www.horroraddicts.net

HorrorAddicts.net 135, Suzanne Madron

HA tagHorror Addicts Episode# 135
SEASON 11!
Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich
Intro Music by: Valentine Wolfe

————————

loren rhoads, gild the morn, the veil

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

22 days till halloween

quiz winner, melissa, twilight zone, new quiz, always on my mind, skullman, convolution, halloween costumes, ghost ship, lost souls, the woman in black, suspiria, vampire journals, the hearse, dracula, david, svengoolie, fright night, something wicked this way comes, the travelling vampire show, raw movie, hr giger museum and bar, netflix, american horror story, i zombie, the walking dead, hulu, ultraviolet, vampire bill, jane, pride and prejudice, the last ship, the good place, pushing daisies, dead like me, books, 3 down, chris grams, carole gill, i bathory, queen of blood, wicked lit, suck it up, brian meehl, garth von buchholz, mad shadows, halloween carol special, blood of socorro county, sean t. young,  through dolls eyes, jesse orr, morbid meals, motel hell, farmer vincent’s fritters, minecraft, halloween, midnight syndicate, zombies official game board soundtrack, best band winner, grave of thorns, the belfry, darling, archer, flix, dreamchild, alice in wonderland, lewis carroll, clockwork wonderland, kbatz, the witch, dead mail, halloween prep, todd, clowns, halloween shopping, events, suzanne madron, for sale or rent

 

HR Giger Video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqQ7wygwfHo

Halloween Carol Bonus
http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddictsBonusHalloweenCarols.mp3

Once Upon a Scream- special edition pack

https://horroraddicts.wordpress.com/2016/06/15/once-upon-a-scream-special-edition-pack/

“Broken Pieces” by Valentine Wolfe

http://valentinewolfe.bandcamp.com/track/broken-pieces

HorrorAddicts.net blog Kindle syndicated

http://www.amazon.com/HorrorAddicts-net/dp/B004IEA48W/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1431022701&sr=8-1&keywords=horroraddicts.net

 

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Stacy Rich, Dan Shaurette, KBatz (Kristin Battestella), Mimielle, Killion Slade, D.J. Pitsiladis, Jesse Orr, A.D. Vick, Lisa Vasquez

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

http://www.horroraddicts.net

 

Ghastly Games: Minecraft – Halloween Texture Pack

GhastlyGames2

Most everyone has heard of Minecraft, but for those of you who don’t play, you may not understand exactly what it is.
0922161518aImagine you could build a world with streets, neighborhoods, amusement parks, and underwater cities. Then imagine that if you were bored with the normal world you could put a sweater on it for any type of texture you want. Say it’s Christmas time, you could put a Christmas sweater on your entire world. The basics would still be the same, you still have your museum and opera house in the middle of town, but now it has Christmas lights all over it.

When I first started playing Minecraft I didn’t really understand the coolness of it all. I mean, I was able to build buildings in Sims and in Second Life, no big deal. But in Minecraft you can change those buildings and roads by simply changing textures. Depending on how you want to experience the world that is the covering you choose. They have many different textures. Some of my favorites are Halo, Skyrim, Christmas, Candyland, and of course Halloween.

That’s right, there is a Minecraft theme for our dark little horror hearts. They did everything from changing the animals to skeletons and mummies, to changing the beds to coffins and making the blocks all our favorite colors.

0922161530There are many different ways to play Minecraft beyond the texture packs. They also have skin packs so your character can look like your favorite movie character or dress up as a skeleton for Halloween. You can play Minecraft like I do, in the creative peaceful mode where you can build to your heart’s content without having to earn things, or you can play like my husband plays on survival mode where you have to earn every single thing you get and to survive you’re going to have to kill cows and other animals to eat. You also have to grow your own crops and make sure you’re protected at night time because that’s when the zombies, skeletons, spiders, and endermen come out to attack. I just hope you made some swords to fight back with. There are also these scary monsters called creepers who blow up on you. In survival mode, you can die, so make sure you’re protected before you go out at night or go exploring those caves. I don’t like the stress of playing in survival, but my husband likes trying to survive as if a real zombie apocalypse has happened.

Now, all forms of Minecraft have two alternate worlds contained within that require the production of portals to get to. The Ender Portal takes you to a land where there’s a giant dragon trying to kill you. The Nether Portal takes you to Hell, where a whole other cast of monsters try to kill you, but if you’re lucky you’ll find a castle or stronghold fit for a demon lord.

0922161517aA special note for those playing on Xbox One, the Halloween texture pack was updated last year and contains some animated things like the vampire roses that try to chomp you, the bouncing skull flowers, bloodied-toothed cacti, and blocks that have eyes peeking out between floorboards. Also, the same texture pack comes with a Halloween town sample that you should look at before you start building your own world. The sample features a haunted house, a spooky town that looks like Harry Potter’s, and a massive roller coaster that goes through a clown’s mouth and down a monster’s gullet.

If you’re thinking about trying out Minecraft, now is the best time. The Halloween texture packs are only available during October, so if you want to try it out, you must be on watch soon. Happy mining!

HorrorAddicts.net 134, Loren Rhoads

HA tagHorror Addicts Episode# 134
SEASON 11!
Horror Hostess: Emerian Rich
Intro Music by: Valentine Wolfe

————————

loren rhoads, gild the morn, the veil

Find all articles and interviews at: http://www.horroraddicts.net

43 days till halloween

scare factor song quiz, win a book, phantoms, halloween decor, costumes, bad alice, cemeteries, statues, loren rhoads, cemeterytravel.com, david watson, scary rooms in movies, underworld blood wars, books, hollow house, greg chapman, the plague pit, alan frewin jones, sarah killian serial killer for hire, mark sheldon, crystal lake publishing, tales from the lake, vol. 3, sumiko saulson, beneath the lake cast, blood of socorro county, sean t. young, through dolls eyes, jesse orr, the artwork, james goodridge, nightmare fuel, dj pitsiladis, phillip experiment, open ghost doors, goth drag king, jean batt, victor/victoria, just one of the guys, morbid meals, dan shaurette, se7en, ants, carbonara, ghastly games, goosebumps, zombie kids, one night ultimate werewolf, one night ultimate vampire, booopoly, vampires of the night, midnight syndicate, zombies board game soundtrack, terror trax, gild the mourn, best band season 10 poll, kbatz, frightening flix, the veil, dead mail, murdo, plague pits, london, carl, office angst, pen, valerie, halloween carol bonus, loren rhoads, lost angels

http://www.Cemeterytravel.com

Scary Rooms – USA Today

http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/movies/2016/09/05/creepy-horror-movie-rooms-disappointments/89722886/

Underground Plague Pits

http://www.bbc.com/autos/story/20160906-plague-pits-the-london-underground-and-crossrail

Halloween Carol Bonus
http://traffic.libsyn.com/horroraddicts/HorrorAddictsBonusHalloweenCarols.mp3

Once Upon a Scream- special edition pack

https://horroraddicts.wordpress.com/2016/06/15/once-upon-a-scream-special-edition-pack/

“Broken Pieces” by Valentine Wolfe

http://valentinewolfe.bandcamp.com/track/broken-pieces

HorrorAddicts.net blog Kindle syndicated

http://www.amazon.com/HorrorAddicts-net/dp/B004IEA48W/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1431022701&sr=8-1&keywords=horroraddicts.net

———————–

Write in re: ideas, questions, opinions, horror cartoons, favorite movies, etc…

horroraddicts@gmail.com

————————

h o s t e s s

Emerian Rich

s t a f f

David Watson, Stacy Rich, Dan Shaurette, KBatz (Kristin Battestella), Mimielle, Killion Slade, D.J. Pitsiladis, Jesse Orr, A.D. Vick, Lisa Vasquez

Want to be a part of the HA staff? Email horroraddicts@gmail.com

b l o g  / c o n t a c t / s h o w . n o t e s

http://www.horroraddicts.net

Ghastly Games: Monster Fluxx

GhastlyGames2

On episode #133, hear Emerian Rich talk about Fluxx, Monster edition

fm fmFluxx is a card game where the rules keep changing and the excitement never stops. You still start out simple: draw one card and play one card, changing the rules as you go, while collecting up different cards to combine into the goals. Changing Goals will keep you on your toes as well, and Action cards are still shaking things up! Monster Fluxx takes classic monster movies and TV shows and adds them to the basic Fluxx deck. With the prominent monster presence, this deck is designed to introduce new players to the Fluxx system and has it has just four main card types.

 

Find out more about this awesome game on Episode #133, coming September 3rd.